Which Alan Partridge quote should you use in bed?
Which Alan Partridge quote should you use in bed?
Smell my cheese, you mother!
Smell my cheese, you mother!
Smell my cheese, you mother!
Smell my cheese, you mother!
Swans! You feed beefburgers to swans!
Swans! You feed beefburgers to swans!
I've pierced my foot on a spike!
I've pierced my foot on a spike!
So you think I can't tell anecdotes? Just pop that down for a second, I'll sell you an anecdote! In 1974 I was catching the London train from Crewe station. It was very crowded; I found myself in a last-minute rush for the one remaining seat beside a tall, good-looking man with collar-length hair, it was the seventies; buckaroo! I looked up and saw it was none other than Peter Purves, it was the height of his Blue Peter fame. He said, "You jammy bastard" and quick as a flash, I replied, "Don't be blue, Peter!" Needless to say, I had the last laugh, now fuck off!
So you think I can't tell anecdotes? Just pop that down for a second, I'll sell you an anecdote! In 1974 I was catching the London train from Crewe station. It was very crowded; I found myself in a last-minute rush for the one remaining seat beside a tall, good-looking man with collar-length hair, it was the seventies; buckaroo! I looked up and saw it was none other than Peter Purves, it was the height of his Blue Peter fame. He said, "You jammy bastard" and quick as a flash, I replied, "Don't be blue, Peter!" Needless to say, I had the last laugh, now fuck off!
Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan!
Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan!
Mousse from a bowl is very nice, but to put it on a person is demented!
Mousse from a bowl is very nice, but to put it on a person is demented!
I know a cracking owl sanctuary, how about it?
I know a cracking owl sanctuary, how about it?
Women... What are they?
Women... What are they?