Waiters And Waitresses Reveal How They Treat Single Diners

It's very dependent on how the single diner is giving off body language. If their wrapped up in a laptop and doing what appears to be business work or something of that nature, I typical shorten up my sales pitches and try to make sure that meal is as complete as can be, without coming off as being overbearing or interrupting their work. If its a single diner who comes in just reading a paper or toying around on a smart phone, and they do not appear to be in any rush what so ever, I like to ask more personal questions like why they came in, what their in town for, where they work etc etc... This is something I normally don't get into too much when there is a party of 2+ because that's something that their probably already talking about to one another.

I've worked as a server for the past 6 years and I can say I never truly treat any two tables the same. It's all about reading body language and adapting to how the guests react to whatever I'm doing for them. Some people when they come in to dine want to just get a meal, be treated nicely, and have everything go smoothly.

Others are very open to entertainment and small talk and generally like getting personal or sharing stories. The biggest thing about being a server is giving exceptional service, regardless of what someone looks like, smells like, acts like etc. Just because that one shitty table you had came in and gave you an awful tip, doesn't mean they didn't enjoy themselves. I like to think about it like maybe that's all they could afford due to medical bills or something going awful in their life.

Sometimes people in those situations go out to eat to get away from everything else, and maybe they have an amazing time and only tip you 5-10% but they tell their rich friend John C. Moneysworth and he comes in, requests you because his friends said you were great, orders a super expensive bottle of wine off the reserve list, and leaves you a 20%+ tip. I like to think Karma works heavily in the Waiting world.

nldarab

Sometimes single diners can be the very best. I used to work at.... A burger place (sit down) and there was a lady who came in, looked straight up homeless, didn't seem quite sure of where she was. Everyone ignored her, I figured she was just looking for a bite to eat. I offered to help her and sat her (I had assumed I was buying her meal at this point) she sat she ordered with a bit of help. She didn't say a single word through out her whole meal. But I made my best efforts to take good care of her. Towards the end she asked for her check I wasn't quite sure what to say. The last thing I wanted to do was insult someone by vocalizing my assumption that they can't pay for their own meal....

But I didn't want to take money from her if she seriously was homeless and was in need of a meal. I had no choice as the managers happened to be actually doing their job at the moment and I had to place the check on her table. Before I could set it down she handed me a 20 (her meal was 9 and change) she gave me a huge smile and a quick hug and said "You're the nicest waiter to have helped me, ever" she came by every once in a while and refused service from other servers asking for me. She always left the best tips and was never difficult. I still don't know why she ALWAYS looked homeless and hardly spoke a word but I guess people are eccentric and you never really know what you'll get.

lolTHEtroll

The restaurant that I work at (in Los Angeles) has a very "neighborhood-y" vibe - AKA: we have a lot of regulars. And a lot of those regulars mostly come in solo. So I tend to hang around their table and chat/catch up with them, which results in other single-diners at nearby tables chiming in on the conversation and making everyone feel welcome and friendly.

Now, I'll admit, that every once in a while you'll get that bitter and angry solo guest that hates the world and is going to take it out on their server, but those are pretty uncommon. At least in my experiences.

In short: I feel that I typically give my solo-guests more attention than I give an individual in a large group.

brandonhardyy

As a long-employed server and bartender, here are the basic three models I've encountered repeatedly in my time.

The person who is there simply to eat and drink and wants solitude. You can spot the book or kindle from across the room. They often decide what they want (or at least something to start) before you get there. Keep the drink full and drop the check early, but don't skip any steps of service.

The person who is there for some company. Doesn't have anyone to go out with, but wants conversation or camaraderie. I often see these at the bar. They take immediate interest in what television stations are on, and are usually very friendly from the first moment they come in. Light chat and attentive service are key. Make them feel special.

That dick who doesn't know how to order takeout. He knows what he wants when he walks in, and he doesn't know why it took you so goddamn long to greet him, and he's not sure he likes your attitude. Fuck that guy. Seriously. Make him think twice about coming back.

(There's also the occasional weird bitch who comes in on her phone, sits in a booth by herself, orders basically nothing but is still somehow super-high-maintenance, and doesn't talk to you or really acknowledge you but stops random coworkers walking by to tell them she needs something. These are rarer, and a delight when I find them. As long as you're polite, you can spend literally as much time as you want harassing them.)

In any event, a good server shouldn't treat a one-top any differently than any other table. Generally, these people eat and leave quickly, and as long as they tip well, I hope they return soon. If they're pleasant or funny, or both, all the better.

Backdoor_Man

I've been in the service industry for several years, and this is the single most important advice I could tell anyone who gets in to this industry.

In the first greeting you have to read everything you see, asses the personality types, and adjust your pitch according to how they're going to respond.

People give me shit about working in this industry, but I can get a good read on someone in about five minutes. Works well when I want to use my powers for evil

Odiddley

If it's a lunch shift I'll spend more time at the table and chat with single diners. Especially if they're older or bring in a book to read (sounds counter intuitive, but a simple "Oh, I love that author, have you read Blah Blah?" really works). Refill the coffee nice and often. Boom, extra friendliness equals awesome tip. At night? Ain't nobody got time for that shit. I treat them like everyone else. Okay, here's your food. You doing alright? Alright cool. I got a screaming kid at table 3 who really needs his mac and cheese. I gotta go yell at the kitchen again.

Edit: I did not make myself clear. If someone has a book, I am not constantly badgering them and chatting the entire time my table is there. I make a brief comment when the person first sits down. As a reader myself, I always love when someone asks what I'm reading and shows an interest, so I try to do the same.

CrystalElyse

I treat them like any other customer. My boss loves lone diners; he says they come to your place not to socialize, but because they really want the food. I think he's a little out of touch; I always went out alone because I don't know how to cook, but okay. Sometimes I'll be a little chattier if they would like to chat, but Christ, I've had some people keep me at their table for a conversation when I have about a million other things to do. Anyone can do that, though.

acenarteco

As a waitress I always used to enjoy serving people who ate alone,because you very quickly know where you stand with them.

Whether they sit, glance at the menu and say 'Hi yes,I'll just have the daily special and a tap water,thanks' with a book or laptop straight out,you know they're going to be satisfied with a simple and prompt service without much fuss and minimal conversation - (Let's face it,there's nothing more embarrassing for either party having to endure a conversation, especially when one has made it quiet clear they want to be left alone!)

On the other hand I always used to enjoy the customer who comes to dine and take in a different atmosphere from work or home, wants to chat, ask for recommendations, wants to know more about you etc, it really used to change a rubbish shift into a pleasant evening :)

LomoLover

I haven't been a waiter in years, but I can tell you that being a single diner didn't change how I treated you. What matter most was the initial judgement I got from the customer when I first approached the table.

To explain: Everyone has a different idea about what a server should be like. Some people want the happy-go-lucky, talk your ear off server, while others want business-first, take your order, deliver your food, and never notice my presence sort of server. And all the other possibilities in the middle.

Every server has a natural tendency. I'm more professional than some of my old co-workers. Some did better with college aged tables, while others could handle kids and families like a god. So when you walked in and get seated, I'm immediately judging what best way to approach you. The first five seconds of interaction are done at a base level (Base for me), from there, I'll shift my personality to match what I believe you want from a server.

Single diners were the easiest to judge. I wasn't getting mixed signals from multiple people, I wasn't worried about working around an event like a birthday or first date, and most single diners were happy to chat for a bit without me feeling like I was ignoring someone else at the table. Hell, my favorite regulars, many of whom I still keep in contact years after I've quit, were single diners.

Plus, you guys tend to tip better out of guilt of taking a table for only one.

Desdomen

This will almost surely get lost somewhere and it's a bit off topic, but I would dine out by myself regularly during the summer of 2008 while I was taking a night class between my high school and my first semester of college. Once a week after my Monday or Wednesday class I would go to a particular Steak'N'Shake and grab a burger, shake, or whatever I was in the mood for. It was almost always quiet and there was almost always the same waiter there. I became a regular; he would guess my orders and we'd banter back and forth as he worked.

One night, right after midterms, I came into S'n'S nearly in tears because of the three hour long combined essay/multiple choice test I'd just been subjected to. I was 18 and I'd never taken a college class before. I was mentally exhausted and terrified that I might have failed the test, something that I was sure would set the tone for my whole college experience. On top of all of that, my hand was cramping and my head hurt badly enough to make me feel sick.

This waiter, whose name I can't remember, went to the back room and got some Tylenol and a glass of water, made me a strawberry milkshake, and brought out one of my usual orders before I could even ask him for anything. Then, he sat down across from me and asked me about my day. Later, when I went to check out, I found out that he'd given me his discount and I just left a $20 on the table for him because it was the only money I had. He really deserved so much more because, at that point in time, that was the single nicest thing anyone had ever done for me.

I'm really glad that I was dining alone all those times I went to S'n'S because I wouldn't have gotten the opportunity to get to know that waiter like I did. He was a really cool guy.

Mastemma

People come in to restaurants alone for a lot of reasons. Sometimes they're travelling on business, sometimes they want a quiet table to sit and read while they eat, maybe they're lonely, or just hungry and in a rush. Whatever the case, I have to assume that those people chose to dine out instead of ordering food and eating at home or in their hotel because they wanted some sort of human connection. This is the highlight of a server's career! A lot of guests have bad habits of forgetting that their servers are people, too, not just food-bringing robots, so it's always nice to know that someone came in specifically to engage you and maybe make a friend.

I always give my single diners extra attention because whether you're in a group or alone, restaurant dining is about making a connection over food. A lot of single diners have the best stories to tell and no one to tell them to. That old man who comes in every Wednesday afternoon? This may have been he and his wife's favorite restaurant for years and years. That young woman who looks a little lost? She just decided to move to a brand new town on a whim.

Many servers groan over single diners because they generally make less money off of them, but all it takes is a little more diligence to figure out how to make a worthwhile connection. Some of the best tips I've gotten were from single diners, because our interactions were more intimate. One of my favorite memories as a server was when, through talking to a man who came in alone, I discovered that he was alone in a foreign city on his birthday. We gave him free dessert, a chef's hat (that part's standard) and another table saw the celebration going on and called him over to their table. They ended up chatting a bit, too, and the man hugged me at the end of his meal.

Single diners are one of my favorite parts about working in a restaurant because they are the ones who understand more than anyone that servers are fellow human beings worth engaging and befriending.

nevillewearsprada

Former waiter here. I worked at a fine dining restaurant but it was inside of a hotel. Frequently, we would have guests of the hotel on business trips come and dine at the restaurant, many of them single diners.

This is how I've noted different diners and this is about 80% accurate personal experience.

Couples: The clientele we usually get would be local birthdays or anniversaries. You always (most of the time) had to wait and see what the lady wanted to drink first, which could take anywhere upward of 15min (no joke. This happens when you have a lengthy drink list). Nothing starts until the lady gets orders her drink. Then you have to wait for them to order apps and/or salads, main entree's and finally, the complimentary dessert (being a birthday or anniversary). It is painstakingly slow process for a couple to come in for the first time, give them a spiel about the restaurant, explain the specials, wait for them to order and try your best to time everything accordingly. (How long the app they ordered is going to take, whether or not the kitchen is slammed or if your ticket will be fired right away so courses don't overlap). These tables usually tip 10%-15% occasional 18%-20%.

Groups: There are two types of groups. Groups you can grat and smaller groups that you can't. Our restaurant was lucky enough to grat parties of 6 or more. Typically things go a little faster while ordering drinks; no one wants to be the asshole to keep everyone waiting. The guy who orders 2 bottles of wine for the table is my savior. The time is consumed more on ordering food. Agreeing on appetizers, giving everyone time to figure out what they want to eat (additional grace period to ensure everyone is ready is typically added) could take up to half an hour to 45min. In the end, groups are okay because, secretly (its not so secret), everyone is looking at who is tipping what and want to match them or tip more so they don't seem like an asshole when someone "secretly" sees how much they are tipping. Or one person pays and usually if they are paying for a group, then they can dish out some good tip money. That, or the group is large enough to grat the 18%.

Side note: You can choose not to grat the large groups but that is a gamble I've learned to never take again.

Single Diners: Like clearwind had mentioned. They are usually in and out, no problem, for they wait on no one. They know exactly what they want to drink, don't have to wait and sometimes when I go to the table they give me their entire order right then and there. Their tips are generally 15%-20%. These are my favorite type of customers.

You have to understand that under these different circumstances, waiters have different "techniques" to move the tables that much quicker. Not in a rushing sense, but in an efficient manner. Higher bill = higher tip (also depending on the service).

I will purposely not bring out bread until you order your entree to ensure that you are indeed hungry enough to eat that 24oz Ribeye you just ordered. If I brought out bread, you would be less hungry and order an 8oz filet instead, reducing the cost of the bill, reducing my tip. Similarly, with groups, I won't bring out your appetizers until you order your entrees for similar reasons. I don't have to worry about ANY of this with single diners.

And if you are going to be a dick, you have already decided that you aren't going to tip well. I'm not going to pay much attention to you. I rather cut my losses and focus on tables that are kind, that I have a good rapport with and have a better chance at getting more cash at the end of the night.

There ARE exceptions to these types of groups. Both positive and negative but in general, this is what I have experienced. Waiting tables is a balance of putting up with people's shit, the bartenders shit, the cooks shit and doing it all with a smile on your face.

TL;DR I would gladly take a single diner ANY day.

Philobus

I work at a Japanese Sushi Boat restaurant in San Francisco, and I always try to sit singles next to each other. The way the restaurant is laid out, is a Sushi Bar surrounded by chairs in a circular manner. We can only fit about 30 people in at a time. Therefore, it's nearly impossible to not have a conversation with the persons next to you. I've definitely seen relationships start there!

tristamus

I'm both a waiter and someone who genuinely enjoys having meals alone (not all the time, but sometimes it's nice).

Probably echoing a lot of what has been said. Generally they tip well, don't linger, and you're not worried about timing visits so that they aren't mid-conversation.

Overall, they're awesome, and single patrons probably get better service on average than couples or groups.

middledeck

As a waitress, I have never had a problem with single patrons.

Honestly, in the restaurant I work at many of the single people who come in are regulars, so I really enjoy getting to know them. Since they are single, I don't feel that I am intruding on their time with a SO or friends, so I'll sit down and talk with them for a bit. And of course, people who eat alone do usually take less time, and so my turn times are faster, meaning more money. So there's always that too.

Honestly, the waitress at Red Lobster probably either genuinely forgot, or has learned through experience that single people don't usually eat a whole basket of biscuits.

Next time (if you didn't before) pull the waitress aside and ask why you haven't gotten biscuits yet. I have a feeling it was a simple misunderstanding, not someone being prejudice against single customers.

MissPippi

Each customer is different.

When I had tables of one I would try to read them just like tables of two or three. If they were chatty or wanted to talk, I would spend some time there. Just like bigger tables.

If they brought a book and glasses, I would do more of a quick refil drop by service.

Making money waiting as a male is all about reading people and giving them what they want. If you cannot do this you won't make any money.

Making money as a female is about being attractive. Not fair but that is how life works.

jaette_kalla_mik

I'm a cook, not a waiter, but we usually get old people who never married in to eat by themselves. The waitresses usually sit with them for a few minutes after they get their food unless there are people waiting for service. On a side note, there is this old man who's wife died a few weeks ago and he comes in sometimes and orders his usual and his late wife's meal and then eats what he can. Usually there is a waitress sitting with him throughout the entire meal just talking to him. The other waitresses understand and take over the rest of the tables for her.

videoflyguy

Waiters and waitresses, please stop asking "Just one?" when I walk in. I travel a lot, and this question is asked 50% of the times I come to eat. Nobody ever says "Just two?" or "Just eighteen?".

The "just" part in it kind of implies your surprise that anybody wants to dine alone. Maybe I'm reading this wrong, but that's the impression I get.

cold-n-sour