Funniest DOG Texts
Funniest DOG Texts
So these two friends did a little thing, where they'd pretend they were a dog and person, and they've come out with some pretty funny results.
Here are 10 Dog Texts I've found online, enjoy :)
So these two friends did a little thing, where they'd pretend they were a dog and person, and they've come out with some pretty funny results.
Here are 10 Dog Texts I've found online, enjoy :)
#1
Dog
Who are these people in our house?
Owner
Guests.
Dog
Are you going to introduce me?
Owner
Nope.
Dog
Not to ALL of them, just the guy in the blue jeans.
Owner
Nah.
Dog
JEEZ. I DON'T EVEN WANT TO MEET THE WHOLE GUY. JUST HIS LEFT LEG.
#2
Dog
CHASING TAIL.
Owner
GET IT. GET THAT TAIL.
Dog
ALMOST GOT IT.
Dog
ALMOST GOT IT.
Dog
ALMOST GOT IT.
Owner
Try changing direction.
Dog
OMFG TAIL CHANGED DIRECTION TOO.
Owner
That sneaky bastard!
#3
Dog
You should be posting texts EVERY DAY.
Owner
Alright.
Dog
People need to know what I'm doing every day.
Owner
Okay.
Dog
You can't keep me from telling my story.
Owner
UGH.
Owner
.... what did you do today?
Dog
Stared at the wall for six hours, then barked at my own fart! 
#4
Dog
How long do I have to wear this cone?
Owner
'Til your stitches come out.
Dog
It's HUMILIATING.
Owner
Well, STOP FIGHTING SQUIRRELS.
Dog
I KEEP BUMPING INTO WALLS N SHIT!
Owner
So SIT DOWN.
Dog
WHEN I SIT DOWN I LOOK LIKE A DESK LAMP!
#5
Dog
Hey genius, you left the handbrake off.
Owner
No I didn't.
Dog
Yes, you did.
Owner
NO, I DIDN'T.
Dog
Okay, you 'didn't'. I guess I'm rolling down the hill in someone ELSE'S car.
Owner
OMFG
Dog
This is awesome.
#6
Dog
GOT WET OUTSIDE.
Owner
Stay outside.
Dog
IN LIVING ROOM.
Owner
GO BACK OUTSIDE.
Dog
GONNA SHAKE.
Owner
Do not shake.
Dog
GONNA SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE.
Owner
DO NOT SHAKE.
Dog
WOAH. SOMEONE SOAKED THE LIVING ROOM.
#7
Dog
REMEMBER. You're mom's coming to dinner.
Owner
I know.
Dog
And you still don't have a girlfriend.
Owner
I KNOW.
Dog
I could dress up as your girlfriend.
Owner
Definitely not.
Dog
Dude, your mom will be like: "OMG, I'M SO HAPPY HE FINALLY MET SOMEONE."
Owner
No, she'll be like: "OMG, HE PUT HIS DOG IN A DRESS."
#8
Dog
WHY HAVE YOU BOUGHT FLEA SHAMPOO?
Owner
Er... to get rid of your fleas, genius.
Dog
YOU CAN'T. I PROMISED PAUL, JOHN, RINGO, AND GEORGE THAT THEY COULD STAY.
Owner
You named your fleas?
Dog
THEY'RE THE FLEATLES.
#9
Dog
STILL HUNGRY.
Owner
You've had breakfast.
Dog
WANT. MORE. BREAKFAST.
Owner
You'll get fat.
Dog
What's 'Fat?'
Owner
It's what happens when you eat too much food.
Dog
FAT SOUNDS AWESOME. LET'S GET FAT.
#10
Dog
Have you noticed how I don't lift my leg when I have a wee?
Owner
Because you fell over.
Dog
No.
Owner
Yeah, I saw you try it once, you fell over.
Dog
Dude, that was a COMBAT ROLL.
Dog
I thought I heard a GUNSHOT.