Judge People's Poor Life Choices, And We'll Tell You Which Golden Girl You Are!

"And what grade did you make it to in school, dear?"

"I would have a lot of regrets if I got that tattoo."

"It may be a mistake that will haunt you forever, but at least we know how you feel about it!"

"Not even a single letter."

"I would say that if you got yourself in there you should be able to get yourself out, but I think we both know you're just too stupid."

"It's the great pumpkin!"

"How do you even get your head stuck in something. What are you, a three year old?"

"If I had a nickel for every time I saw someone get their head stuck in a pumpkin, I'd have exactly five cents because this is the first time anyone's ever been this stupid."

"Anyone who parks like either of these morons should have their license taken away and locked up because clearly they have no concept of space and should be confined for their own good."

"Well, you know what they say. Go big or go break every parking law ever written."

"I was always terrible at parking myself, but I don't know if I was ever quite so unique about the way I did it."

"I haven't seen a parking job this crooked since Nixon tried to open a buffalo reserve."

"I once had a nightmare where I was stupid enough to walk out of my house without pants on. It looked a lot like this."

"I've snuck out of a few bedrooms in the dark like that but never in broad daylight."

"What tiny shorts!"

"Who even let her out like that? She's what 14? Where is her mother?"

"Oh, look, a sad clown!"

"Do you think she knows the other girls at the sleepover drew on her face while she was sleeping?"

"I guess no one's ever told her that less is more."

"Honey, if you wanted to look like Eugene Levy you should have made them darker."

"I haven't seen a look of fear so real since Simba saw the stampede of wildebeests in The Lion King."

"Well, maybe he's better at other forms of riding."

"Do you think he knows he's supposed to be on the horse?"

"Some people are cut out for rodeo. Some are not. He is clearly not."

"Wow. I never realized a real-life Barbie doll would look so much like a giant cupcake."

"Listen, your dress can be as big as you want, but no dress is big enough to hide all of your obvious relationship issues."

"It's probably best that he's being suffocated by her dress for both of them. Saves on the divorce."

"I guess the wand is to magically revive the groom after he passes out from being smothered by the dress."

"I'm glad they look like they're still so in love because their kids look pretty unhappy."

"There are some things that are better left in the bedroom. This photo isn't one of them. This photo should just be burned.

"I suppose there's something to be said for sex in happy marriages, but sex in bad photo studios is another story."

"If I had to watch my mother jump my father like that in public, I'd probably look like I wanted to die, too."

"I don't know which is worse, her hangover or the hideous face she's making because of it."

"You don't suppose there's coffee in that mug, do you? Coffee would really help her out, I think."

"I make that face every now and then, but it's for VERY different reasons."

"If you're going to look like that the next morning, you probably don't have any business drinking."