Who said it: Richard Madeley or Alan Partridge?
Who said it: Richard Madeley or Alan Partridge?
Here are some of Madeley and Partridge's best - or should that be worst? - lines. But can you tell who said it?
Here are some of Madeley and Partridge's best - or should that be worst? - lines. But can you tell who said it?
"There's not many better things than seeing an older woman skipping."
"Let's have a bit of red, let's have a bit of white. Ooh, that's a snazzy bouquet. Oh, this smells of, I don’t know, basil. Sometimes you just want to say, 'sod all this wine, just give me a pint of mineral water.'"
"There are more proven facts in my book than in the Bible. People call the Bible the good book, but my book really is good."
"You look at the beach and you think 'ahh, pretty pretty, lovely golden sand, that's safe'. Not in certain parts of the country... quicksand!"
"Do you know what this bathroom says to me? Aqua. Which is French for water. It's like being inside an enormous Fox's Glacier Mint. Which, again, to me is a bonus."
"Do you find that people patronise you? That means that they talk down to you. "
"Remember that soup I made last week? Absolutely horrible. Had to throw it in the garden."
"You're nicer than my wife!"
"Guide dogs for the blind. It's cruel really, isn't it? Getting a dog to lead a man round all day. Not fair on either of them."
"Can we put out that interview I did with Patrick Duffy at Glasgow Airport? It's a tremendous two minutes."
"He suffers for us. He bears our pain in the most public way possible. He serves a timeless human need, one that goes back long before the time of Christ. Perhaps this has always been Paul Gascoigne's destiny."
"I've never met a single woman who's happy with the way she looks. Except Jordan. Although I've never met her."
"Two fat ladies, 88! Not that you’d find these ladies at a bingo hall, of course… they're altogether a higher class of fat lady."
"What is the point of salt grinders? Thirty-plus years of mass delusion. We must be mad."